How To Forgive Yourself For Past Mistakes And Move On
Time-travel movies like “Back to the Future” are popular in society for good reason; we all have things we wish we could do over or erase from our lives entirely. It could be a bad decision we made or a person we really cared about that we hurt. Whatever the regret is, all people have them. Many of us carry them around like bags of luggage. We often don't realize just how much we are dragging around with us from our past and just how much that emotional weight is dragging us down and sapping our energy. You may be constantly thinking of things you wish you could change… But have you thought about how, instead, you could simply forgive yourself?
When you really think about it, “cleaning” your past to get that power and energy back and put it toward your present and future really makes sense. Dragging past events around and the negative emotions associated with those events just doesn't make much sense. There is, unfortunately, no DeLorean and eccentric scientist waiting to jump into your life and take you back in time. No matter how much you may wish for it, so there is no use in wasting energy on things you just can't and will never be able to change.
When you are lugging your past around with you, it can actually taint your future. You end up bringing those mistakes and past emotions into your current decisions and considerations.
To help yourself let go of past events that are really still a force in your life today, you can use a simple visualization technique that can be done with a few items and right at home.
This easy five-step technique will allow you to free yourself of the drain of yesterday. Plus, how you can start investing that new energy into your life of today and tomorrow.
Where To Practice
This technique works best in a quiet space where you're not surrounded by noise or clutter. You won't want to be interrupted either. Be sure to use a quiet spot in your home that doesn't see constant traffic. Be sure to let other people in the home know that you will be in this area and do not want to be disturbed.
Turn off your phone, the TV and other sources of noise and distraction before you start so that you don't hinder your own process, and keep your attention focused.
If you don't have an uncluttered, quiet space, take the time to clean and organize to create one in your home. This will help reduce stress in your life as well and provide an atmosphere for the best results with this technique.
Tip: Organising and cleaning your home can be a stressful process but it doesn't have to be any longer! Check out our guide for decluttering, making your home more positive and how to remove negative energy.
What You Need
To start, all you need are:
- Longer matches, the type you would use for fireplaces
- A candle made of beeswax
- High-frequency music
- Some scented incense sticks
While this list of items may sound odd, keep in mind that this practice is actually similar to meditation. It just needs additional support from the elements and, hopefully, your open and willing mind.
Note that you can use a wax candle, but many people prefer beeswax because it vibrates at the same frequencies as your spine and brain when it is burning.
For high-frequency music, you can use a violin, a recording of Tibetan bowls or bells or any other meditation music that you normally use or prefer.
Your scented incense stick should be in a scent you prefer, with sandal tree being a common choice for karma-correcting exercises. Be sure to light the candle, start the music and have your scent going before you begin.
Clear Your Mind
Clearing your mind is imperative for this exercise, although it's not always easy for people to do, especially in today's busy society. Chances are that your mind is rarely, if ever, clear during the day or at night.
Try sitting for about ten seconds without any thoughts at all in your mind… and this includes thinking “I have no thoughts right now”. Go ahead and relax in a natural way, as a forced state of relaxation won't work. You need your subconscious mind to take the lead for this technique. So, put your logic in the back and have it just observe what is now happening without being able to take action or add a word in edgewise about what is going on.
Visualize The Event
Once you are completely relaxed and comfortable, take one of the long matches and the tweezers in your right hand. You need to have the tweezers by the top of the match, where its brimstone is. Allow your subconscious mind to visualize that event in your life that is truly holding you back right now.
Bear in mind that you may see people and/or events you don't or try not to think about anymore. You may also experience a wide range of emotions. Don't be afraid of what you see. If your subconscious is showing you a loved partner, friends or family members, it's completely fine. Allow your subconscious mind to do what you are asking it to do, without any interference on your part.
Make The Connection
Next, you need to have your imagination relate the event you are visualizing or the stress your subconscious is displaying to you to the match you have held in your tweezers. Then, you can light the match from the part without the brimstone.
While it's burning, really think about the stress or the event itself simply going up in flames. Don't focus on the match itself burning but the event you are working on burning away.
Essentially, you are burning this stress right off your life. You are asking your subconscious to stop treating it as something that is important. This stress is being burned into that life lesson which you have already learned.
While this is happening, you may feel tingling or warmth in different areas of your body. You may even get emotional and start to cry. This is all normal, given what is happening, so let yourself experience it without judgment.
For very powerful stress, you may need more than one match. Plus, keep in mind that you can use as many matches for a stress that you want. Once you really feel as if you are finished with the stress you are working on, light up a final match and imagine what you would have done if you experienced this same event today, with the wisdom that you now have.
When you have finished, you can repeat this process for the next stress, but try to keep your sessions under one hour at a time. Always let your subconscious lead the way instead of your logic for the best results.
This practice allows you to get back all the energy you've been losing to past stress events that you can't change, no matter how much you wish you could. Use your newfound energy in your present life to give you that boost to succeed today!